Run
by i.heart.play-doh
Summary: One word. Three letters. It was all she knew about him, and she wasn’t ashamed of it. At least, not until she gets caught in a whirlwind of emotions with him at the heart of everything. CaRWash.
1. Very Very Present

**hiya! it's me again, & i come bearing with gifts! it's all things CaRWash when it comes to me, so if you don't like Calleigh/Ryan pairings, you've been warned. =P**

**for those who are loyal followers (thanks a bunch, btw) you'll notice that this chapter is unusually short. not to worry; i can assure you that this is indeed a multi-chap, & it'll get much longer. ;)**

**i hereby disclaim that i DO NOT own Csi:Miami. i would love to, but alas, we're all on the same boat. let's just make the most of it & make up stories about them.  
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**so sit back, read on, & enjoy. **

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Calleigh Duquesne could vividly remember when she couldn't care less about Ryan Wolfe. It wasn't something to be proud of, but nonetheless her subconscious wouldn't let herself forget it.

Slowly but surely she realized her numerous shortcomings when it came to Ryan, and as slow as the process went, at least it went. And Ryan couldn't have been happier.

Calleigh, still proud of her enlightenment and maturity of that situation, searched her memory all the way back to when he was first enlisted to work with the dayshift CSI team. Of course it was there, and she allowed herself to be absorbed into the bleak past. As painful as it had been, she wouldn't change it for the world; it made for a bright future with Ryan, in spite of it all.

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_**so this is my first crack at a dramatic & possibly angsty Cal/Ryan fic. how'd i do? reviews make me happy & better at the same time.  
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	2. Past

**hiya! so sorry for the uber long wait; school's been a pain, but now that that's done, you've got roughly two months of me & CaRWash stories! yay! haha :)**

**i hope this doesn't get too confusing as the chapters come along, mostly because it'll be jumping back & forth on the timeline. but it made sense in my brain so i'm just trying to relay it in words & hope it'll make sense in your brains too. **

**thanks a bunch for the reviews; keep 'em coming, cause they're like Red Bull, only non-caffeinated & way better.**

**haha enjoy!**

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If there was one thing Calleigh Duquesne knew about Ryan Wolfe, it was that he loved to run. His several-mile runs were actually the only thing she definitely knew about him.

She was aware he was a stickler for everything; one experience on his first day and endless tales from Eric didn't really make it clear-cut, so she chose not to count it. And that personal experience had only occurred because her father was involved in the case – if it was some other drunk, she'd have probably never intentionally decided to hang around him.

Rookie Ryan Wolfe joined the team when Tim Speedle (practically a veteran) met his fate in a jewelry store while on a case. Calleigh would never understand the ulterior motive behind Horatio's hiring of the former patrol officer, and though she felt that she was close to accepting the event, she knew she would never appreciate it. Or be nice to it.

Naturally, she and Eric Delko, and at times, their motherly medical examiner Alexx Woods, teamed up against the newbie. Only Horatio Caine seemed not to be holding a vendetta against the guy, but Calleigh liked to think it was because he was the boss; he had to look as if he cared.

And Ryan, without anyone else to turn to, grabbed it and held onto it as tightly as he could, even if it was just pretend.

A CSI's job was to be consistent in everything, and that was just what Calleigh was in every aspect of her life. She'd been consistent in her torment of the new kid, constantly ignoring him, interrupting him, taking seniority over him. She even left him at a scene by himself once, without him noticing. It was his fault, she remembered thinking, for not paying attention.

At first Ryan had taken it all in, kept quiet and reminded himself that he was there for the victims, not the people he worked with. He didn't want to be fired for acting out either – this was probably what they wanted to happen. But eventually they started to get on his nerves. He knew they didn't particularly like him for replacing their friend, but wouldn't it have been much easier if they didn't keep reminding him? How was he supposed to work efficiently and be completely focused if they kept on demonstrating their evident resentment over him?

So Ryan became defensive. Calleigh watched as he built a wall around himself, as if she could visibly see and feel the hard stone he was using to make shelter in a place that was supposed to be his second home. She didn't do anything about it, except maybe aggravate and catalyze the construction. With time it got easier to get mad at him, because he learned to be just as rude and inconsiderate with them as they were with him. He fought fire with fire, instead of just letting himself get burnt.

For every mistake she had or anything that had gone wrong, she found herself connecting it to Ryan somehow and blaming him for it. Unconsciously she knew it was wrong, but an opposing voice inside her head always told her that if it wasn't for him, none of it would have happened. Calleigh also realized that the two of them – sometimes with Eric – got into countless heated discussions because of her accusations, but she ended up stubbornly putting him at fault each time.

Toward the end of one such quarrel she said something about how she knows that he knew better than to slip up, and he angrily replied that she had no right to say that, since aside from his first and last names there was nothing else she knew about him (he also claimed that she never looks at him unless they were fighting, and she wouldn't even have registered his appearance then because of all the adrenaline from their shouting matches). He'd stormed off that day, and she didn't see him for weeks after that.

But now she knew about his running.

Admittedly, it wasn't even voluntarily learned. Calleigh had absolutely no intention in finding out about his daily jogs; it was just a big accident. It had happened after their last fight, when she'd assumed that Ryan must have asked Horatio to work solo cases because she never once caught him at work at the time.

The break from him had been good for her – she calmed down more. Enough, actually, to even consider that maybe she was too harsh towards him. After all, it wasn't his fault Speed got shot. Then again, he was too easy of a target to put the blame on, and because she did not properly mourn over her close friend, her grief took a wrong turn somewhere.

It got her thinking to all the past occurrences, when she brushed him off and kept walking down the hallway, when she purposely hung up on him to reduce having to talk to him, when she pressed the elevator button to close even though she saw him running to try and make it. Sure, they were small things, but then she remembered how many times she'd done them, and realized that they must have piled up to an unimaginable height. Add that to the hostility of Eric and Alexx (though Alexx softened after a while), and a newfound admiration for him emerged. If she was in his place, she would probably have already had a nervous breakdown, after blowing up at everybody, of course. She didn't know how he managed to still be sane, but undeniably wouldn't wish to know firsthand.

Her mind brought her back to the day of their last argument.

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**so this chapter is exceptionally mean, i think, but there's some resolution at the end & some niceness. i don't know whether i sold it right, in terms of fluidity & the realness of it. but that's what reviews are for. so please leave one. or two. =P  
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	3. Very Past

**i'll tell you right now that i had this chapter done days ago, but i haven't been on my laptop since. so no, it wasn't from a writer's block, simply from my internet not working when i want it to. **

**i'm so sorry for not updating, but here it is. hope it was worth the wait.  
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_Some months ago_

Whenever home couldn't offer her the refuge she often sought out but never found in the people she surrounded herself with, the Ballistics lab was always the next best thing. It was considered her second home, after all.

A fight with her boyfriend (or ex; the fact that she was constantly unsure whether they were on or off was probably a sign) John Hagen left Calleigh awake all night and well into the early morning, contemplating whether her demands to sleep in her bed alone and for him to be nowhere in sight (he could sleep on the couch or in the bathtub, for all she cared) was too harsh or not firm enough. Realizing that it wouldn't do anybody any good for her to lie in bed and weigh the options of decisions she'd already made, she pulled herself out of bed and got dressed.

Several hours early and she was still driving furiously to work. It wasn't that she had the intention of running over somebody, but that if she drove fast enough, the tears that were threatening to overflow and ultimately impair her vision could do so while she was already off the streets. Why didn't her eyes bawl out while she was pointlessly lying in bed?

She parked her car and walked briskly up the stairs into the lab. The locker room provided Calleigh with the tranquility she sorely needed. Her locker door thumped the metal doors adjacent to it, as she opened it rather carelessly. The echo soothed her agitated state, and soon her breathing rate slowed to a consistent cycle.

The silence did not last long as she heard a rumble of quick footsteps approach her spot in the locker room. (She was thankful the tears never came; she didn't need anybody else getting on her nerves)

Calleigh looked up to find Eric Delko in front of her, panting slightly. In his hands was a pile of neatly folded clothes she immediately figured belonged to their only OCD-ridden co-worker. Furrowing her eyebrows, she asked, "Eric, what's going on?"

"Hey, Calleigh. You're here early."

"I could say the same for you."

"You could, but it wouldn't be applicable – I've been here since last night."

"Then go on, get home. But Eric, before you go, tell me why you've got Wolfe's stuff."

The Cuban glanced down and chuckled. "I was just on my way over here to head home when I heard the showers going. Poked my head inside, found Wolfe in the shower, his clothes on the bench." He shrugged. "It was too good of an opportunity. I had to take them. And besides, he hasn't gotten pranked in a while."

Calleigh frowned, putting her hands on her hips. "I think you're going too far here, Eric. You're forcing him to go out into a glass-walled facility naked." She had no idea why she was defending him all of a sudden.

The look on his face told her _that's actually the point. _Eric scoffed. His chin became prominent in his posture. "Calleigh, the guy deserves it. He leaked information to the media. If it wasn't for us he could have severely compromised the investigation. This," his fingers tightened their grips around the clothes as he waved the pile in front of her and continued, "this is nothing. He gets everybody to question the lab's competence. I say we get him to pay."

Calleigh stared at her friend hesitantly. Though he would never admit it, lately he'd been noticing that something turned on inside her, as if she'd finally realized how completely immature and cruel they were treating the new criminalist. His face softened. "Look, just… please. It'll be funny. You never seemed to have had a problem with messing with him before. What did Wolfe do to you?"

She stiffened. She couldn't have Eric poke his nose around her business, no matter how close they were. "Nothing. All right, I'll help you out. Give them to me." She held out a hand, and Eric complied, passing over Ryan Wolfe's clean change of clothes.

Eric muttered something about finally getting home; Calleigh wasn't really listening. She'd decided to do the right thing for once, and as soon as Eric had left the locker room she made her way to the showers. She hoped his pride hadn't gotten the better of him and that he hadn't already left the room unclothed.

Entering the room, Calleigh braced herself for another one of her patented quarrels with Ryan, which were becoming more and more frequent. Almost every conversation they shared resulted in a heated argument – tempers running overtime and mouths running even faster.

However, she was surprised to see that instead of a bare-skinned Ryan, she saw a fully-clothed one. His back was to her, visibly preoccupied drying his hair with his towel. His brown hair had grown too long for her liking, but he probably wouldn't have cared if she voiced her opinion.

With a calm voice, she said, "Hey."

Ryan turned, clearly surprised that she would actually talk to her in a tone she only used for other people. He stopped what he was doing, and responded in more or less the same tone. There was no need to start a fight if he could help it.

"Uh, hey."

They stood there, each basking in the awkward silence. It was loads better than their deafening voices attempting to drown out the other.

Calleigh figured she should speak up first – she was the one who approached him, anyway. "Eric, uh, found these. Thought I'd return them to you." She held out his folded clothes.

Ryan felt the urge to smirk but used all his willpower to hold it back. She was trying to do something nice for once. He wasn't going to sour the moment with his impulsive facial expressions.

He stepped forward a couple paces, reached out and grabbed it from her hands. He nodded curtly. "Thanks. I've been looking for these." He attempted to smile. It only cracked.

She was going to ask where he got the extra set of clothes he was already wearing but assumed it was the OCD in him. (She never did ask, and never actually found out that Ryan had expected Eric to steal his outfit one day and brought a backup).

Now that the deed was done, Ryan stood there, puzzled. Calleigh was still there, quiet. Normally she wouldn't even have returned his clothes or be in the same room as him unless absolutely necessary. He stared at her, eyes narrowing slightly. Her typically cheery face illustrated the complete opposite. Something was wrong.

Tilting his head to the side, he asked her, "Are you okay?" in a truly genuine caring tone. Her eyes were large and innocent, but clouded with countless emotions, and none of them remotely happy. Her mouth curled downward. He had never seen her so depressed.

Ryan saw her slender body become rigid at the question, as if she was bracing herself for a bombardment of questions. He grew more confused.

Calleigh met his eyes, and he noticed that fiery passion and anger had replaced her previously emotion-varying eyes. "Last time I checked, that's none of your business."

The change in her eyes spooked him a little. He recovered quickly; as bad a habit as it is, Ryan Wolfe never backed down. He knew what he was about to say would bring about another one of their disputes, but said it anyway.

"Oh, okay. Well, the next time you check and you realize that I actually noticed something was wrong and even asked you about it, don't count on me trying to care." He threw the clothes on the bench so roughly that his shirt unfolded and a sleeve dangled dangerously close to the floor. It was starting to bother him already, but held off until after she left. He couldn't let her see him vulnerable.

Her glare grew much colder. "Who do you think you are?"

Unable to fight the urge, he scoffed. "Like you would know."

"It's not like you know me either," she retorted. That should serve him right.

"You won't let me!" His voice was beginning to rise. "You won't even give me the time of day! How am I supposed to know anything about you without it being short of stalking?"

She realized that he was right. Her stare relaxed. "Look, Ryan –"

"Oh, congratulations to me. You actually remember my first name. I would have thought you'd have forgotten since my lab coat's only says R. WOLFE." It was his turn to glare, with his cheeks turning red and his jaw tightening.

She stood there, dumbfounded. How could he think that? Of course she knew who he was. Speechless, he continued instead, "I wasn't aware we were close enough to be on a first-name basis."

Ryan spun around, unable to face her anymore. He closed his eyes and tried to regulate his heavy breathing. In his defense, he tried, he really did, not to be a jerk. But everything inside just accumulated to a burden he couldn't hold in any longer.

Calleigh took this time to search her mind for a reason as to why she'd even gotten mad in the first place, but couldn't find a plausible one. She mentally kicked herself for raising her defenses so quickly and starting the argument. Another fight was not on her mind when she'd entered the room; in fact it was quite the opposite. She'd wanted to mend things before it was too late. And yet here she was, realizing her stupidity after the fact.

His back to her, he claimed, "I think it's best if you go." His voice was eerily calm, and was more of an order than a statement, as if he was warning her to leave before he did something reckless.

Calleigh only ignored him. "I'm sorry," she said, softly. There. Finally.

He turned back, brows furrowed, ears straining to hear. "What did you say?" he prodded gently, in pure disbelief.

"I didn't mean for it to come to this. I'm sorry."

"You have nothing to be sorry about. I should be the one."

She nodded. They silently forgave each other. "Just… don't you dare say I don't know you, because it's not true."

He shrugged. "It is a little true." This made it known to her that he wasn't prepared to give her a clean slate. She couldn't blame him for doing so.

But then he said, "At least now we're on square one."

Calleigh was taken aback. "… As opposed to what, exactly?" Weren't they always just stuck on that proverbial first square?

With a small grin Ryan replied, "As opposed to hell."

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**thanks for the reviews from the past chapters. what'd you think of Ryan's appearance in the story & the hopeful turn-around of our favourite couple? don't be afraid to review; comments are awesome. **


	4. Present

**:) i reward your wonderful patience & perseverance with this story by making it extra long. i'm hoping this satisfies the long wait i gave you. actually, the reason for that is because i was about to update it sooner but when i reread it for proofreading i noticed i missed something, so that took a while for me to add in. **

**i hope everyone's summers are going well; lots of chilling & pigging out like i am. **

**anyways, enjoy.  
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Calleigh felt guilty for trudging on home earlier than the others the night before, that she'd woken up extra early that day and found herself driving to work several hours before her shift started. The fact that her dinner date with John (the reason why she'd clocked out when the night was still young) hadn't turned out well did relieve some of the remorse, but she was intent on forgetting about that fiasco altogether.

Weeks had passed and Calleigh was glad to report that she and Ryan were on… well if she had to be honest with herself, 'okay grounds' – it may not have been 'good', but it was still better than 'shaky grounds'.

Their relationship was complicated, at best. That much she'd admit, though obviously not proudly. The disputes had lessened, sure, but she felt there was always something missing. Because they weren't fighting as often, they were only discussing lab results, crime scene observations, work-related stuff. Calleigh thought it simply wasn't enough to just be speaking in forensic jargon; that while it allowed for conversing and solving cases, it didn't really help their relationship outside work.

Their conversations were awkward. It consisted merely of one-worded answers and uncomfortable silences. One time she'd asked if he wanted to join her and Eric to a bar to loosen up after a tough case. She hoped the change of environment would solve their strenuous attempt at dialogue. But all she got was a lame excuse and an incredulous Eric for having even considered bringing Ryan along.

Her thoughts kept returning to what he'd said weeks earlier. Was it really that bad, what she and the rest of the team had done? _Yes, yes, a million times yes._ She suddenly understood that, even after the two of them had forgiven, it would take a long while to forget.

She cursed silently. If her subconscious had known her actions were bad, wrong, unethical even, then why hadn't she stopped? What made her so angered at Ryan that she completely ignored her own morals?

The confusing part was that he hadn't done anything to get her unhinged in the first place. He did his work, despite the countless obstacles the team had purposefully put up. His OCD allowed him to be exceptional at the job, so that definitely wasn't the problem.

And he'd only become a jerk after the hard time they'd given him, so that didn't count either.

So what was it?

She stopped at a red light, still unable to find an answer.

Calleigh had established a long time ago that Speed's sudden death certainly had something to do it, but it couldn't have been the whole reason. Besides, Ryan couldn't have done anything about it anyway.

Was it the way he sometimes acted without thinking when it came to other people?

Was it the way he always seemed to be thinking but not acting around her?

Was it how he'd managed to send chills through her body every time he got a little too close during a heated argument?

Was it how she'd long for the touch of his warm breath on her skin, or yearn to feel his aura practically reaching out her? (and failing, considering her every effort to push him away)

A loud horn blasted through her car's glass windows, snapping her out of her reverie. The light had turned green – most likely a while ago, given that once she pressed her foot on the pedal and got her car moving the traffic light proceeded to yellow and the vehicles she'd held behind were honking deafeningly and shouting profanities out their windows.

Slightly disoriented from the incident, Calleigh shook her head free of her thoughts and forbade herself from venturing any deeper into her last theory.

At least, not until she got some questions answered.

--

Calleigh pulled into the Crime Lab's parking lot soon after, her mind fixed solely on making up for lost time from the night before.

No sooner had she stepped off the elevator of the appropriate floor that she'd seen a silhouette sitting on the floor, facing the sun. Or where it would be, given that the sun hadn't risen yet.

Her curiosity piqued, she quickly abandoned her strict plan on being productive and approached the mysterious profile.

"Ryan?" she queried, in total astonishment. She simply couldn't believe the sight before her.

He looked up, just as surprised as Calleigh, but most likely for different reasons.

"Calleigh. What are you doing here?"

"I do work here, you know." She saw his mouth twitch slightly upwards. If he didn't have control over his facial expressions, she'd have pegged the tic for a smirk rather than a smile. But he was trying, so she gave him the benefit of the doubt and told herself he was struggling to smile.

Her thoughts had prevented her from actually seeing his mouth curl up into a small smile and then get serious again after deciding that it might be too early on in their relationship to be using sarcasm as a bantering tool.

"Yes, I'm aware of that. But I meant why are you here so early?" The last time he'd asked her that was when they engaged in a full-blown shouting match in the locker room. He never did learn the reason why she was there that time either. Judging from the somewhat sad look on her face – which she'd worn weeks ago when she daydreamed again – he figured it was the same cause.

This time her answer was significantly less cold. "I uh… I felt bad about last night so I decided to clock in early and make up for lost time. What about you?"

He shrugged and looked out the glass panels. "I like to watch the sunrise. The view at the lab is much better than back home, and it ensures I'm not late for work."

Silence ensued. "And the quiet does me some good. It's a nice change of pace from the hustle and bustle during the prime hours."

Calleigh remained hushed, absorbing the tranquility of their surroundings. She nodded, "Yeah, it's nice."

Ryan briefly gazed at her and then down on the floor. He slouched against a glass wall.

Calleigh put all her weight on one leg, immediately becoming casual, as if they were already best friends who were completely comfortable with each other, when in fact they were contradictory to the notion.

"Well, I feel like I'm intruding on your alone time and noising up the ambiance, so I'll leave. I'll see you later?" Calleigh said, her eyebrows raising up in anticipation.

He glanced up swiftly, straightened his posture, then patted the floor next to him.

Glad to have been offered, Calleigh complied, setting her purse down before sitting beside Ryan. She sat like him, legs stretched, with one leg on top of the other. Her hands were clasped on her lap, while his were curled into soft fists and laid on each thigh.

"You're OCD, aren't you?" she inquired suddenly, unsure herself why she posed the question or why she'd asked with such fascination. She'd never been interested in Ryan's life before.

His eyes narrowed. He affirmed her with a wary voice.

She cocked her head to the side and her own eyes shrank into slits. Her eyebrows furrowed and her nose flared. What looked like an expression of anger was actually one of extreme enthrallment.

"So then how come you're sitting on the floor? Isn't it against your need to stay clean and to being obsessive-compulsive altogether?" she asked him the question with such wonder that he chuckled.

Calleigh was surprised at the sound of his laughter, but found that she liked his laugh. She grinned, radiant teeth showing, but was still puzzled.

His chuckle subsided but a smile remained. It was a while until he'd responded.

"I think everybody is entitled to at least one moment of rebelliousness. It's time I claim my moment and be a rebel. So I'm here, sitting on the floor, revolting against my own beliefs for the sake of being a bad boy."

She laughed, shaking her head at his foolishness. She had no idea he was so easy to talk to and had a sense of humor. And while he was correct in saying she didn't know much about him, she had a good feeling it was all about to change. For both sides.

Calleigh turned her head to face him, and found he was already looking at her.

"Can I ask you a question?"

"Sure."

"How come you've been so distant?"

Ryan's lips tightened into a thin line. It looked as if he was fighting with himself on what to tell her.

"I don't know… I guess I thought that if I came here and acted like myself – you know, joking around and stuff – that everyone would think I was some insensitive moron. I mean, all of you just lost someone who was clearly close to you. I didn't think it'd help my case as the newbie if I was going all happy-go-lucky on you."

Calleigh nodded solemnly, accepting what Ryan had just said. Yes, he had some setbacks that let her question whether he was to be trusted, but they'd all turned out to be misunderstandings. So he had some shortcomings. Nobody's perfect.

"It didn't really help, did it?"

She paused, careful with her words. "I think it gave us the wrong impression of you, that's all. We weren't the most welcoming people either."

"At least it was reciprocated." They laughed softly.

Silence enveloped them again, only this time it wasn't the awkward kind. Calleigh smiled as she looked out the glass at the sun rising over Miami with Ryan. Light filtered through the glass windows without fail, illuminating the lab.

_This is progress_, she thought, watching as Ryan closed his eyes and sighed deeply, fully relaxed. Not the kind she'd planned before heading off to work, but much better anyway.

Calleigh sat with Ryan for much longer than she'd expected, but definitely didn't regret staying.

--

_Some weeks later_

Talking to Ryan hours before shift started quickly became a morning ritual for Calleigh. Gradually she kept coming earlier and earlier, but Ryan always seemed to be there, waiting for her to arrive. She was on her way there though, half an hour earlier than the day before.

Everyday they would talk, about anything and everything. It was incredibly relaxing, Calleigh thought, to have someone whom she can tell the most meaningless things to, and still be able to disclose issues that were closest to her heart.

Calleigh stepped off the elevator with a coffee cup in each hand. She smiled softly as she saw that their spot was unoccupied. Finally, she beat him there. She was going to have a field day with this when he came. She sat down and made herself comfortable, knowing he would be coming soon.

Of course, her growing relationship with Ryan had its unfortunate consequences. Like John, who grew more and more suspicious whenever Calleigh left earlier than usual. Granted, he had every right to become doubtful because she always gave him excuses of a non-existent workload that she wanted to lessen. But Calleigh felt she had done the right thing by not telling him the truth. If she'd told John that the reason she spent less and less time at home with him was because she was beginning to prefer spending time with Ryan over him, he certainly wouldn't take it well. Simply put, John was territorial.

Like Eric. Who wasn't too happy about the situation. Who glared at Ryan like he wanted her all to himself instead of Ryan getting all her attention. Who was incredibly shocked every time he found her laughing with Ryan on their case while he worked solo for the umpteenth time. And it wasn't like he was quiet about the whole ordeal either. He complained and insulted and gave dirty looks so often Calleigh wondered how she thought Ryan could have endured with twice as much as the trouble Eric was currently giving them. She almost would have screamed in Eric's face to shut him up if Ryan hadn't grabbed her arm and sharply whispered that it wasn't worth it.

He'd understand, she hoped. If he'd give him the chance, he'd see how wonderful Ryan really was.

She liked him, she decided one day. She found she laughed and smiled and was generally happier when she was with him. They both were. That couldn't be a bad sign or a wrong move on her part in getting closer to him.

So she had no objection when Horatio paired them more often. And she didn't really care whether Eric or John had something to say about her and Ryan. Ryan taught her that if they had nothing nice to say, it wasn't worth their ears processing them. Calleigh had laughed at the statement. But now she was living by it.

Ryan Wolfe was intriguing. That was all there is to it. He never seemed to run out of surprises. Though his mind worked in ways more complicated than her own, his eyes could tell her what he thought before his mouth could. Calleigh could never do that with anybody else, and nobody else could see what she does with Ryan. And she loved that.

An hour passed. Calleigh wondered what would be taking him so long to get there. Maybe he was just running late, she thought, not completely certain of her own reasoning for his absence.

The next thing she knew people were beginning to clock into work. Sadly she stood up, straightened her clothes and picked up the other cup of coffee, as she'd already drank hers while waiting.

Calleigh was on her way to her Ballistics Lab to get started on some work when her cell phone rang. She sighed in relief. It was probably Ryan who called to tell her he's sorry for missing their morning talk. She prepared to give him her mock anger tone.

"Hello?" she answered, nonchalantly.

"CSI Calleigh Duquesne? I'm Doctor Campbell from Miami General. I apologize for the bother but you're listed here as CSI Ryan Wolfe's emergency contact."

Heads turned as Calleigh dropped both her phone and the cup of cold coffee meant for Ryan.

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**:O oh noes! leave reviews, pretty please. :) i'm off to write the last chapter. **


	5. Very Present

**i know, i know. what took me so long? well. it took me a while to find a suitable reason for why Ryan was in the hospital. i kinda had an idea, but i needed something real. i hope the conversation with the doctor makes sense & isn't too boring.**

**the good news? it's 3,000 words. that's like, eight pages. which is awesome. i make up for the long wait by lengthening the story. ;) & i'll tell you right now that whatever's in the italics is a story in itself that's already occurred that i cut up in-between what's happening presently.  
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**this is the last chapter. finally. but it was ridiculously fun writing this genre. someone should have told me sooner. don't fret; i've got lots more stories coming. haha yay! :D **

**so here it is. enjoy.  
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"_Ryan?"_

"_Hm?" _

"_How do you do it?" _

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Calleigh paced the hospital floors, in deep thought. She'd rushed to Miami General as soon as the numbness in her body began to fade. Adrenaline had run out just as quickly as it stepped in; her journey from the lab to the waiting room had been a blur. But she clearly remembered tears.

She was still in shock from the phone call. It certainly wasn't what she'd expected. What could he be doing at the hospital? He was fine the day before.

She refused to think something had happened on his way to the lab that morning. There was no point in worrying herself with unproven scenarios.

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_Ryan glanced over at his friend and squinted. "Do what, Cal?"_

_Calleigh smiled at the nickname. "How do you –" she yawned mid-sentence, "Oh, wow. Sorry. How do you stay awake?"_

_Ryan closed his eyes and placed a hand on his chest. The short pause allowed Calleigh to drift away from reality. She didn't notice him taking several short breaths. _

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* * *

_

She jumped when her cell phone rang. Intent on preventing another bombshell she glanced at her Caller ID before flipping it open.

"Eric."

"Calleigh, where are you? We've got a case – supposed to be Wolfe's but he bailed. Nobody can find him and he won't pick up his calls."

She stopped pacing. Her blood began to boil as realization hit her. If she wasn't at home or at work or answering her phone she'd already be deemed missing and patrols would be alerted to scout for her. But here was Ryan in that situation, only the end result was the exact opposite. The whole damn lab just assumed he was out playing hooky. So they went about their own business and did nothing.

Instead of ranting at Eric she sadly replied, "I'm at the hospital with him." She hoped it would finally get through to him that Ryan was actually a human being.

She heard a small chuckle from the other end. "Calleigh, the guy probably knows how to collect evidence from a victim. Don't tell me he forgot or something."

Calleigh sighed. Fat chance for that kind of hope. She laid it out bluntly, "He's hurt. His doctor called me, told me I was his only emergency contact. So I'm here, being a friend to him, something you're not too familiar with."

She bit back her tongue to keep from saying more. "Look, Eric, I'm sorry. I just… I don't need this right now. I'm just worried about him."

"No, no, it's all good. You're right, I've been a total jerk. God, I can't believe it had to take him being in the hospital for me to realize… is he okay?" His tone softened into genuine sympathy.

She smiled inwardly at the change in Eric. "I don't know, they haven't told me anything."

An awkward silence surfaced. Calleigh could hear the Cuban breathing brusquely out of his nostrils. "Well, good news is it couldn't have been a shooting or anything like that, 'cause then they would've called us."

"Yeah." Calleigh wasn't really paying attention to Eric anymore. She grew more and more worried, not so much as what could have happened, but what would happen as an aftereffect.

But she knew she would be no help if she just stayed there and walked around, so she said, "Tell me where you are. I'll meet you there."

The response was immediate. "No, Calleigh, you don't have to. Stay there with him; you're his emergency contact for a reason. I can hold down the fort here. He needs you more than I do."

"Thank you, Eric, really."

"Sure. I'll let Horatio know about Ryan."

Calleigh closed her cell and continued her pacing. For some reason her mind kept bringing her back to a conversation she'd had with Ryan a couple days ago. She didn't know why, but she welcomed it. At least she didn't have to worry.

* * *

"_Well, you know, I'm uh… I run a lot." He stopped, feeling winded. Calleigh nodded sluggishly, still dosing off. "I don't think that answered your question but I have a feeling you're not even conscious right now."_

_She leant her head on the wall, chin raised up in defeat. "Yeah, no, you don't make sense. You don't run anymore; you're here in the morning now. I would know, I'm here too." Sleep was definitely winning. _

_

* * *

_

Calleigh smiled at the thought. She'd come to the lab at 4:30 in the morning, hoping to beat Ryan there. But, as usual. She hadn't. They chatted animatedly for a half hour, but fatigue had paid her a visit soon after. Having to wake up earlier and earlier in the morning had begun to take their toll on her, but she'd been determined to outdo him.

She took a seat on one of the empty chairs in the waiting room and looked up briefly at the doors where she anticipated Ryan's doctor to walk through any minute since she'd gotten there. No such luck yet.

* * *

_He laughed softly and ignored the thumping in his chest. "Scratch what I said, then. Replace it with, 'I'm a morning person.'"_

_Long blond hair covered Calleigh's face as her head dipped over. Ryan smiled at how lethargic she seemed to be moving; it was cute. Unexpectedly her head snapped up, her eyelids slowly opening. They revealed accusing eyes. _

"_What, are you saying I'm not a morning person?" A finger went up and gently poked Ryan's shoulder. Her hand fell to his lap, and neither made any efforts to remove it._

_A sudden wave of dizziness came over Ryan. His vision blurred and he felt as if his chest was about to explode. But he remained calm. This had happened to him before, and every time he managed to keep it under control, so this didn't worry him._

_

* * *

_The doors swung open, exposing a tall man in a white coat. Graying hair confirmed her presumption that the man was middle-aged – late 40's, early 50's, maybe. In his hand he held a clipboard, which he was consulting.

Calleigh stood up, straightening her clothes quickly before he could reach her. However old he may be the man just looked like a doctor.

"Miss Duquesne?" He looked up from the clipboard, searching for her. She walked up to him and smiled politely. He took out his free hand and offered it to her in a handshake.

"I'm Doctor Campbell. We spoke on the phone earlier." Calleigh just nodded. He already knew her name so she didn't volunteer it again.

"How is he?"

"A little unstable, but he'll be all right."

She let out a happy sigh. "What happened?"

Behind glasses Doctor Campbell's eyes narrowed in preparation for a long explanation. He set his arms to his sides before speaking. "You see, Mr. Wolfe has what's called aortic stenosis."

He paused to see her reaction. It was blank, telling him she wasn't familiar with the term or was aware his patient had it.

So he continued. "Now normally the aorta has three valves. But Mr. Wolfe was born with a congenital heart defect that left him with only two instead of the usual three."

This time Calleigh nodded in understanding. "Right. Bicuspid as opposed to tricuspid."

"Exactly. So this catalyzed the symptoms to begin presenting themselves. Anyway, aortic stenosis basically means that the valves have narrowed considerably. This forces the heart to pump harder in order to deliver all the blood to the body efficiently. Typically indicators that someone has aortic stenosis don't emerge until they are well over 65 years old. But his heart defect, along with other factors, caused the ailment to come much sooner than expected."

Calleigh's forehead wrinkled in confusion. "What other factors? He didn't smoke or anything."

"Smoking is definitely a factor, but you're right – we have verified that he doesn't smoke. But that's not it. High blood pressure runs in his family. Even the fact that he's male contributes to it. Records from his physician also tell me he's a frequent runner."

The high blood pressure and his gender she could understand. His temper can be incredibly short and aortic stenosis probably occurred more often with males. But his running? She couldn't wrap her head around it.

"Wait, I'm sorry, doctor. But you're telling me his desire to stay fit is what made him sick quicker?"

"Well, yes. When he exercises his heart has to work harder to distribute more oxygen to his body. Add that to the fact that it already has to pump harder when he's not excessively active. This wears out his heart much faster."

"Ryan used to run every morning before work. He hasn't run in months; I've been with him every morning since he stopped. Shouldn't that have prevented it from coming, at least not for a while?"

"He was diagnosed some months ago. It hadn't gotten serious enough then so his physician just prescribed him some medication and informed him to stop running. From your account it looks like he followed the advice. But he was actually wheeled in here wearing runner clothes."

"Oh, all right. So what happened to him now?"

"All I gathered is that he came in an ambulance from a coffee shop not far from here. Apparently he was buying two coffees and was about to leave when he just fainted. The cashier came around, checked his pulse, and found it was beating too swiftly to be regular and that it felt like his heart was pounding."

Calleigh stared at the doctor's gentle face, but wasn't focused on it. Her thoughts were far away. She felt betrayed; why hadn't he told her? They were friends now, real close friends, actually. They shared their deepest secrets and fears with each other and without reserve. There shouldn't have been anything stopping him.

"Can I see him?"

"While it may be rare that aortic stenosis is at this stage at such an early age, it is certainly treatable. He needs surgery if he wants to live a long full life. I've already discussed this with Mr. Wolfe, and since it's not fatally dangerous if he isn't operated on right now, he said he doesn't mind waiting until after all the more serious patients have been tended upon. He should be stable by now. A little tired, most likely, but he's lucid. You can visit him. But only for a while. We want him to get some rest."

She knew Ryan would worry more that his heart might prevent him from working as a cop rather than worry about his heart killing him prematurely. And she didn't want him to either work somewhere else or die, so she obviously had to ask. "Doctor, is this going to affect his job?"

"I understand he is an officer, Miss Duquesne. But the success rate from this operation is remarkably high. He'll make a full recovery and he should be able to live through the rest of his life without any restrictions. He and his heart will be fine, so there's no need to worry."

Calleigh smiled brightly. She gratefully thanked him then made her way to Ryan's room. She needed to see him just as much as she needed answers from him the doctor couldn't give her.

* * *

"_No, Cal. I'm saying that you need to sleep if you don't want to fall face first into a blood pool later."_

"_Good idea… but what about the sunrise? And you? What will you do?"_

"_The sun – and work, for that matter – aren't coming for another three hours. Besides, we've seen the sunrise everyday for a while now. I'm sure it won't be any different. And don't worry about me – watching you sleep is making me a little heavy-eyed." _

_He smiled despite himself. That sounded like a good enough excuse to pass out for a while before he loses consciousness during work. _

_

* * *

_Calleigh pushed the door gently and crept inside. The room was plain, and smelled strongly of disinfectant. There was a television connected high up on one of the white walls, turned off. One wall was a large window, but shutters covered the bright sunlight daring to enter. A chair was off to the side, adjacent one of two matching wooden end tables on each side of the bed.

She walked up to the bed, where Ryan lay. He was propped up on several pillows. His skin was a little too pale for her taste, but it wasn't anything some sleep couldn't cure.

She rested her arms on the metal railing on the side of the bed. It was cold to the touch, but she didn't care. For a while she watched him rest peacefully. She took his hand in hers and smiled softly, feeling the hot tears roll down her cheeks. He was okay.

* * *

"_So we're going to sleep together?" her words slurred, but were truly innocent. Ryan chuckled at her half-conscious self, who probably hasn't realized the sexual implications in what she'd just said._

_He put his arm around her and she cuddled up to him. "Yes, we are. Any objections?"_

_Her hands found his free hand and clasped it softly. "Nope." He felt her shaking her head to accompany her response._

_Ryan closed his eyes again, hoping for the darkness to stop the world from spinning. His heart had been beating rapidly during the whole conversation, but it seemed to have slowed down as his breathing fell into regularity. He felt himself slipping away. _

_A voice called out to him just as he was on the verge of unconsciousness. _

"_Good night, Ryan."_

_Hers._

_He dozed off with a small smile on his face. "Good night, Cal."_

_

* * *

_

"Cal?"

She opened eyes she wasn't aware were closed just as his revealed weary hazel eyes.

"Hey, you," Calleigh choked out. She sniffled.

"I'm not dying, am I? Don't cry. Come here." He pulled her hand to him and she complied, leaning over. Ryan enveloped her in a hug. She only held on tighter.

When they let go of each other, their hands were still entwined. Calleigh laughed a little, using her free hand to wipe the tears from her eyes. Ryan beamed, now fully awake.

"Ryan?"

"Yeah?"

"You're not allowed to run anymore."

Ryan chuckled and nodded. "Sounds like a good idea."

"Seriously, though, why didn't you tell me?" Her smile faded and was replaced with concern.

"If I told you, would you have treated me differently?"

She didn't give it another thought. "Well, of course –"

"Exactly." She stared at him, perplexed. He continued, "I didn't want anybody to pity me or make fun of me. Like I'd told you before, I don't want to be treated another way. I want to be looked at just the same as anybody else. Besides, it hadn't been much of a problem until recently."

"I understand your reasoning, but you should have at least told me."

"I know now. I'm sorry."

She squeezed his hand, silently forgiving him. He made sense, and truthfully she would have done the same thing.

"How come you all of a sudden went running today?"

Ryan shrugged his shoulders. "I don't know. I hadn't felt any pain; I thought it would be okay if I at least went every now and then. I guess my heart wasn't prepared for the intense activity since I'd stopped so long ago."

Calleigh ran a hand through his brown hair. Their eyes locked.

"So where does this leave us?" Calleigh whispered.

"I have no idea," Ryan replied, just as softly, "but it's definitely nowhere near square one." They shared a smile as they recalled their first and only resolution, as they hadn't fought at all after that.

A nurse knocked and entered. She smiled at the cute couple. "I was told that if there was an Operation Room open that you were first on the list, sir."

Ryan shook his head. "Please, don't call me 'sir'. I'm not even thirty. Call me Ryan."

The nurse was hesitant. "Um, okay, Ryan."

Calleigh laughed at her awkwardness. "Don't mind him."

"Yeah, it's not really me; it's all the drugs you've been feeding me."

She turned back to him, "Actually, your doctor said you're completely coherent. You're with us all the way." She looked to the nurse for affirmation. The nurse nodded.

"Really? Oh, well then it's all me." Ryan showed his perfect teeth and winked at the nurse, who laughed gawkily. She looked like she felt so uncomfortable being there.

"Thank you, nurse. I won't be here long, so you can take him and his ridiculous self to the OR."

She nodded again and before leaving said, "I'll go and get some more nurses to help me wheel you to the OR… Ryan." She turned and left just as she finished talking.

Calleigh and Ryan just laughed. She playfully slapped him in the shoulder. He only laughed harder.

When the hilarity subsided she tugged at his arm faintly. He looked at her curiously as she pulled his arm again, probably for another hug. So he sat up straighter and began to close the gap between them.

But he didn't feel her arms embrace him again. Instead her forehead met his. His breathing increased in anticipation of what would happen. She grinned at the monitor beeping more intensely.

His eyes closed as her lips leaned in to his. He never felt her lips touch his, though; she'd kissed his cheek. Ryan's eyes opened to see her standing back, her mouth widened into a beautiful smile at the dirty trick she'd just played on him.

He pouted in mock defeat, and even shook his head. She giggled.

"You're a devious one, you know that?" his fake pout broke into a smile.

"There'll be plenty of time for that after you get better, I promise."

Ryan thrust an arm up in triumph and mumbled a long "Yesssss!" under his breath. She slapped him casually, then took his hand again. Calleigh felt holding his hand was where she was meant to be. Ryan felt the same way with her, and so he held onto it snugly. Their fingers intertwined perfectly.

"Thank you for being here, Cal."

"You're welcome, Ryan. And I'm glad I'm here. Now go and get fixed. I'll be here when you get back."

Ryan smiled, "I know you will."

* * *

**OMG! it's done! :) what'd you think of this chapter & the story as a whole?**

**btw, i put the flashback-story thing in italics because it was supposed to be an instance when Ryan is experiencing the symptoms of his aortic stenosis. but i tried writing it so that it seemed like his dizziness, fast-paced heart, etc. etc. was because of Calleigh doing un-Calleigh like things if she were fully conscious. i hope that makes sense. let me know if i pulled it off. =P  
**

**i'd like to thank all of those who took the time to read this story. i'm really proud of it, & i'm glad i can share it with you. special thanks to those who left reviews & support - you helped tremendously in motivating me to continue this. so let's keep on being addicted to CaRWash, the cutest most perfect pairing ever. haha ;)  
**


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